publicado por anpatriciaa às 2014-04-19 11:50:43
You have a nice group of friends this year and think of how you will always have this connection, you shall be 40 and your kids will play together, you shall be 100 and be drinking tea. Also, you meet this boy, you've been together for about 3 years now, you trust him, you love him, you feel safe, you can't help thinking that what you have is different from every other relationship. Yet, one day, just like that, things somehow change and it's all over. You move university, you move city, you go abroad, and hell, sometimes, you stay in the exact same spot, but somehow, things just change. You feel confused and everything you felt and went trough just feels like a lie. You lived a lie, and all those moments just don't feel special, they just hurt you.
It gets me thinking the obvious, nothing is certain, nothing is stable, nothing is forever. You should just enjoy the moment, try not to remind yourself that it will all end soon, for that will prevent you from truly enjoying all the beautiful moments you spend together, and yet, at the same time, try not to dream too much, for you will be living a lie. I should stop writing now, my mood is, as it shows, demotivating.
Right now I have no hopes for my life, I will study and try to be successful, but it just feels that you are always alone, no matter how many people you get along with, relationships are too fragile. And the only one that will never end (not by choice) is the one with yourself, even if it's the more problematic of all.